This was written as a HUMOR piece. I assume no liability for any loss or damages if you're foolish enough to actually send it to a customer. If you lose all your business and starve to death, I don't want to hear about it. I hereby place this page in the public domain and you are free to copy any or all of it for whatever purpose you desire.

Dear Valued Customer,

We are responding to your RFQ for p/n ___________________, received on ___/___/___.

Please note the following issues with your print. Some of these may simply be money wasters, others are show stoppers:

One of the following actions will apply:

We’ve tried to respond with some typical snarky machinist humor to get your attention and keep your day interesting. If we’ve gone so far as to check any of the boxes below it suggests you may want to examine your business relationships and maybe adjust your expectations as to what a machine shop requires to make a part and what we can and can’t supply, while still making enough profit to remain in business.

Thank you,
Your friendly local machine shop